Inside Zzorhn's Mind

Dear Diary ; I've chosen to post my current thoughts in one single post. I did this because it's so profound. I'll leave a link to my regular diary AKA Obscure Arcanum - Chapter Thirty Eight ... ...yea! Thirty eight (38). Where are all the other chapters?   Gone. Like a fart in the wind, all my work online was deleted and is now gone forever. I was able to salvage some of my work, because I managed to get my computer back, however, we're talking nine (9) years of diary writing, PLUS all my work I've EVER done since 2006. Everything before 2022 was destroyed. My email addresses? Destroyed. My paintball company's website. Gone. Pictures, letters, and so much more, merely wiped off the face of the interweb. Everything, gone. There's two flips to this coin; the fact that someone else can do this as easily as logging on to a computer left errantly turned on, and I'm appaulled that someone would commit this evil, destructive act.  Three -and-a-half DECADES of ...

 Words and their meaning to me “Oh, OK!” - Does NOT mean I'm agreeing, in fact, it's the opposite. If you hear the words, “Oh, OK!” it means I think you're full of shit, but I don't have the time nor crayons to fight with you. “Fine” - Does NOT mean I'm OK or agreeing with you. It means the exact opposite of the word's definition; basically “Fine” is akin to a dare (See “Go ahead”) “Go ahead” - This isn't me giving you permission, in fact, it means the exact opposite. It's a dare, as in, “Go ahead and see what happens...” “Whatever” - Similar to “Fine” or “Oh, OK!”, it means the exact opposite; “Whatever” is my way of stating “Eff you, go ahead, I'm FINE!” “Nothing” - Always means “Something”. If you hear the word “Nothing” it's an indication I don't give two shits to share with you what I'm actually up to. “It's OK” - Means I've picked and chose my battles, and believe this particular battle to not be worth my time. With the utte...

 I dedicate this short story to mom. She's always been an inspiration to me, and believed in me. Thank you, mom! I love you! There is indeed a moral to this story; no matter who you are, no matter how broken you may be, someone out there loves you.... And there's a place for everyone in God's plan. It was a snowy day outside the little antique shop. Fluffy, white snowflakes danced merrily to the ground amid the scurry of people passing by the big picture window. The new snow made a crunching sound under the boots of the busy shoppers. Ke-runch, crunch, crunch, squeaked the boots on the fluffy white snow. In the window was a beautiful display of antique Christmas wares. There was cups and saucers, some candles, a couple of display stands for cookies and other sweets, and a hand-carved wooden platter. A few decorative plates sat at the back. Right in the middle of the window was a small, hand-made angel. The little angel wasn't very tall; barely taller than the fancy...

 So, what I want you to do instead is picture in your mind, a beautiful Spring day.....You're in a field of green, softly blowing grass..... The sky over head is a crystal clear porcelain bowl of pure blue. Now as you look around the field, you see this tiny baby deer scampering in the grass, so innocent, so unaware of opportunities, but also rudimentary timid to an almost instinctive level. It's mother watches over a safe distance away, but she is a familiar face at the pile of corn, and has no fear of humans. As you watch this young deer scamper through the wide open field chasing butterflies and having a merry old time of itself, you suddenly get the desire to pet it. Why not? Most animals seem to enjoy a good rub or a soft caress, so why not a baby deer? It's so perfect, so incredibly mind-numbing kick-you-in-the-feels CUTE, that you cannot envision in your mind any reason NOT to pet this baby deer. Oh. And look, it's coming over to you. It sees you, and is very c...